I Need To Buy A New Tux

I’ve won an award!

Yes because of my debonair charm, keen wit, masculine physique, handsome face and great humility, yesterday the Academy notified me that I am a recipient of a 2005 Wise Funky Blogger Award.

Actually, what the e-mail said was, “You made it into my Wise, Funky Bloggers post! If you want the code to post your award on your blog, e-mail me using the link on my blog! Cheers!”

But I’m sure an awards banquette must be scheduled. Searchlights will sweep the sky. Red carpet rolled to the curb. Photographers will flash bulbs in my face as my limo driver opens the door for me and Ginny (She can wear that low-cut blue thing with no back)…

I’ll modestly strut to the podium amid thunderous applause, straight-up cool as I always am, while starlets swoon and losers who did not win an award bite chunks out of their Champaign glasses…

I have my acceptance speech already written:

Ladies & Gentlemen, I want to thank the academy, Ms Funky Bugs, and the United States Department Of Agriculture Food Stamp Program for enabling me to be here tonight…

To read the entire Press Release concerning my prestigious award, please visit the Wisdom of Funny Bugs at http://funkybug.blogspot.com/

And under my United Bloggers’ Union contract, Funky has to pay for the limo, Champaign and my tux…Right?