Jesus Made Me Lose My Santa Suit.

I used to own a Santa Claus suit — red velvet, white fur trim, wide shiny black belt, high black boots, snowy beard, tasseled red cap.

During the season I’d wear it to amuse the kids — (and on one memorable occasion to amuse Ginny, but we won’t go there).

Anyhow, years ago this guy asked to borrow my Santa suit for some charity thing.

I loaned it to him.

He never returned it.

And I never asked for it back.

I can’t.

Jesus said not to.

“Give to every man that asketh of thee,” He said, “And of him that taketh away thy goods ask them not again”.

I wish He hadn’t said that.

It would have been nice if He’d have stuck to talking about the flowers of the field and the birds of the air… But Jesus tends to meddle in real life.

According to Him, I’m to give, to loan things without ever asking for them back.

This situation has percolated in my mind recently because a couple of weeks ago this neighbor borrowed something from me for the weekend with the promise that he’d return them on Monday.

When I loaned the tools I casually mentioned that I’d need them back to do my own yard. I felt reluctant to let him take off my tools in the first place, and I worried that he’d dull the blades, and I hinted that I really wanted them back on Monday…

And he said he’d return them Monday…

But that was Mondays and Mondays and Mondays ago.

He still hasn’t returned them.

Sorry bastard!

Why in the world would Jesus let him get away with it?

If Christian bill collectors followed Jesus’ instruction, they’d loose their jobs.

If you don’t ask for it back, you’ll never get it back and come Christmas, you’ll be naked beneath the tree (but that’s another story and I said we won’t go there).

Why did Jesus tell us to let things go without asking for them back?

I wonder if He did it to emphasize that the borrower is responsible for keeping his own promise. When we say we will do something, we are to do it.

Jesus practiced what He preached. Why, when He borrowed a tomb from Joseph of Arimathaea, He returned it just as He said He would. He returned it in good order. Hardly used. He even folded up the grave clothes.

On the other hand, I wonder if this teaching of Christ’s about not asking for things back lets me know how much of a hold possessions have on me. I loaned that guy my Santa suit over 20 years ago and it still galls me that he didn’t return it.

Is that red suit so important that I harbor 20 years’ worth of resentment?

Do I own those missing tools, or do they own me?

My Bible contains 1,341 pages. Not one single word in those pages tells me what somebody else ought to do.

Not one single word!

It never says “They shalt not steal” it only says, “John Cowart, thou shalt not steal”.

I think it should tell them what to do. In fact, if I were to write the Bible, it would be a lot different. But I didn’t, so it’s not.

The Scripture never tells how somebody else ought to treat me, only how I am to treat them.

And I treat them nice!

Yes indeed, over the years I have loaned people clothes, and tools and money and boo….

Oh. Damn!

Out of the corner of my eye I see in my bookcase that copy of Archbishop Fenelon’s book on Christian Perfection that I borrowed from Mr. Darby over four years ago…

I said I’d return it to him in a week….

Let’s forget that I ever wrote this posting. OK?